The Happy Pill

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/03/28/prompt-singing-the-blues/

Its kind of ironic for me to be writing about this for I am the saddest person I know. And if you ask me how sad, I was diagnosed with Depression last January of 2014. Fun way to start the year right? But its actually not all bad, I actually learned a thing or two during my head imbalance.

As the Daily Prompt puts it: “We all feel down from time to time. How do you combat the blues? What’s one tip you can share with others that always helps to lift your spirits?”

First of all, I don’t feel down from time to time… it was more like 24/7, but not until I started taking my “Happy Pill” (and no, that is not the tip I am sharing with you). The Happy Pill as my doctor explains it is not to increase my happy hormones but instead it is supposed to balance chemicals in my head. More of trying to get me to think Normal again.

During my medication, here are the things I learned… and might as well be considered tips:

1) I am an Over-thinker. The things that makes me sad is all in my head– I was consumed with my regrets in my past, fear in future and non-existent voices telling me I am not worth-it. Regrets, Future and Voices, are things I could not physically hold at the present but I let these ruin my day.

2) The initial effects of my Happy Pill stopped me from thinking the things in 1. There was a point that I felt like I was not thinking about anything at all. It just made me busy… and hyper even. One time, I CRAVED doing a coloring book and that craving did not leave me for 2 weeks… not sure if its really healthy, but not thinking (too much) made it easy to do things.

3) But as my mind gets comfortable with the Happy Pill, there are moments of blues, moments that I still hate myself… Made me wish that the initial effects stays forever. As soon as everything calmed though, I realized that the things I am doing is not just “just because”I do it because I feel better doing it. No matter how small it is, whether it is for you or for someone else, like cleaning the house or cooking for your family, no matter how small it seemed it made me feel it is worth it. Now I always remind myself that giving love, no matter what shapes and forms it is, is way better than anything else.

4) One of my biggest fear and mistake though is comparing myself to others. Even it is not intended to compare, you couldn’t help it when someone will suddenly talk about how a person is successful, how great they did with their lives and all that. This 4th thing is something that I still need to work on, I am trying to keep in mind that I am not someone else… that each person have different sets of priorities, stories and strengths and I need to find my own way, my own pace.

5) Finally, and definitely not the least… laughs, convos or whatever shared with my family, my friends … and playtime with my pets may possibly be my greatest weapon to combat blues. It may not be as long term as the first 4, but possibly the most effective for me.

6) And sometimes, it doesn’t have to make sense. If you don’t want to feel sad, play the song and watch the video of Happy by Pharrel Williams and dance like crazy…

I still have a lot of issues in me to work with but these are my ways anyway… and I am happy to share it. 🙂

These are my pets btw, I play with them when I don’t want to think sadness:

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And by the way… I am off the happy pill, hope it stays that way coz they are not cheap i tell you.

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